Posts Tagged ‘personal growth’

What are you waiting for?

July 21, 2009

There literally is no time like the present. The past is a quick glance in the rear view mirror and the future is a gift waiting for us to arrive at it. So many people waste the present by lamenting the good old days even if they weren’t so good.

A lot of folks engage in a bit of revisionist history when looking back. It is the ego’s entrenched method of keeping us out of the only thing that matters: THE PRESENT MOMENT.

The future is used by the ego as a mechanism that provides relief; for example – oh just wait things will be better when _______,(fill in the blank).

If you would like to ensure a bright, happy, vibrant and prosperous future, use the present moment to manifest it.

If you just start by visualizing your perfect day and then solicit a feeling state of what it feels like to have a PERFECT DAY, you will pull that experience toward you. Even if your present circumstance seems somewhat hopeless, try inventing a bright future.

Right here. Right now.

Really, try it.

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Fear

May 19, 2009

I see so many people put breaks on their goals because of fear. Some are afraid of failure, while others are afraid of success. Crazy but true.

The ego wants to keep all of us right where we are. It is threatened by change of any kind. For example, if you have played the role of the victim most of your life, meaning you have given away your personal power to negative conditions or circumstances, the last thing your ego wants is for you to succeed. The ego doesn’t want change.

That’s why it is very important to use fear to propel you forward, rather than to paralyze you into inactivity and compliance to the ego’s whims. Overcoming fear by staying committed, persistent and consistent can provide the emotional intensity needed to support you as you move to attain your goals.

Have a great week and fight your fears with optimism!

No News Is Good News

April 23, 2009

During my workshops, I challenge people to swear off all news media for a week. Cold turkey. I ask them to check in on their energy level each day and by the end of the week, they’re all more energetic as they haven’t been absorbing the media’s constant stream of negativity.

It is a bio-spiritual fact that bad news are emotionally draining. It’s a fact that while viewing, hearing or reading about robberies, murders and rapes, we release hormones, such as cortisol, which damage our minds, bodies and spirits.

When my mother asks “how do you know what is going on if you do not watch the news or read the newspaper?”, I tell her that I do know what’s going on: someone was murdered, the financial community cheated someone and we are at war with someone. Right?

I do not watch the TV news broadcasts. I have trained myself to only read articles with a positive vibe. I do scan the internet for optimism filled stories because I know they are out there.

It may seem like I live in a bubble, but that’s not the case; I just refuse to flood my system with negativity every day.

Life is too short. I want to enjoy it.

What do you think?

Appreciating Parenthood

April 10, 2009

It is very important for parents to understand that parenting does not always reveal immediate results. Our children often immediately reject the lessons we strive to teach them. The key is to focus on the quality of the process and not attach ourselves to the outcome.

It can take children of all ages a while to understand the benefits of good parenting. A sure fire pathway to stressful living is to measure your success as a parent solely on whether or not your children are getting it.

Additionally, it is imperative that parents ritualize silence and reflection. In other words, setting a time and a place to stay quiet, breathe deeply and internalize appreciation for our children and ourselves. Intentional appreciation is a powerful bio-spiritual tool for restoring energy, and having an optimistic outlook on life and parenthood.

We must enjoy the journey because it is the destination in and of itself.

Have a great weekend!

Positive Energy

February 12, 2009

I recently spoke to the NJDMA ( New Jersey Dietary Managers Association) and was delighted to see the eagerness of the group to learn new ways to inspire and motivate their staff. They were very in tune with the idea that any change they want to see take place, starts with themselves. They firmly understood that accepting their responsibility as leaders to be vibrant and joyful would rub off on the staff.

There will always be bumps in the road, but it is the way we handle them that sets the tone and example for those that look to us as leaders. Bringing positive energy along in every facet of our lives, not just the good times, is an attitude which has the power to not only improve our lives, but also the lives of the people around us.

Positive energy is not about always smiling or being happy, it is about seeing the good in every situation we face. No matter how bleak it may be. At times, such an attitude can be very hard to maintain, but who said life was easy?

FYI: My most sincere apologies for the postponed self-help panel. I will make sure to inform you as soon as a new date and time are established.

Ritualize Positive Thinking

January 20, 2009

A belief is nothing more than a thought that occurs numerous times. That thought then becomes what a person believes to be a truth.

A great tool for optimistic living is to train yourself to think different thoughts over and over again.  Set up a ritual to be silent, and bring to your mind positive thoughts about  situations that seem to be challenging. Think and FEEL the positive resolution.

Do it repeatedly. Make it a habit.

Thinking and feeling positively will formulate a different set of beliefs about those challenging situations. Go ahead, try it.

I dare you.

Pivot Away From Negativity

January 6, 2009

With every new year, comes a new rhyme and here’s mine: 2009, the time is right to feel fine.

Are you smiling yet?

I coached college basketball for many years and one of the most important fundamental skills I would repeatedly teach is the ability to pivot. When a player runs into a situation in which their desired path is blocked, they must pivot away from the defender(s) and put themselves in a position to maneuver freely again.

The same is true for feeling states.

If you find yourself in a negative frame of mind, it would behoove you to learn how to pivot into something more positive. It takes practice. In my speeches, I always tell the audience to learn to trap all negative feelings right then right now, and pivot away from them.

The next step is to immediately replace those feelings with something more positive, something powerful. Notice the change and remember how good it feels to have positive thoughts. Stop waiting for something to happen to change your mood; develop the ability to pivot by practicing with each negative feeling state.

Practice makes perfect.

Personal Growth Through Sports

December 11, 2008

Yesterday I stood in front of 50 athletes and coaches and talked to them about their responsibility as students, athletes and leaders. I stressed the idea that sports have to be about more than the games being played.

When we reduce the lofty teaching potential of athletic participation to the score of the games, we have lost a chance for personal growth.

Athletes have the responsibility to show courage in their decision making. Leaders have to sometimes be like the eagle. The eagle does not flock with the crowd; it stands alone with pride. Athletes are under a microscope with others watching their every move, this means that they must move about with a high level of integrity.

They have the unique chance under public scrutiny to blend mind body and spirit with a unity of purpose like no other venue. We the public hold athletes to very high standards, and rightfully so. Applying the same standards to our personal lives will foster personal growth.

It will make us better individuals. Stronger individuals.

Intentional Appreciation

December 5, 2008

Happy Friday everyone!

As I’m sure you’ve noticed, appreciation and gratitude are topics that I like discussing. The reason behind this is that acknowledging the great things that we have going on in our lives is essential to our growth as humans.

Gratitude and appreciation are  power tools that help us build a joyful, abundant and optimistic life. This can be done right here and right now. Learning to generate these feelings in real time, no matter how the situation appears, is a key concept in healing and releasing old wounds and perceived problems. When you develop the practical and spiritual tools of being grateful and appreciative for all that comes your way, you’re on the path to a blissful, energy-packed life.

Even if your life is functioning fairly well but lacks a little of the zest and zeal you desire, gratitude and appreciation, generated on purpose and with intention will ignite your soul like nothing else.

We live in a very stressful and fast-paced society. It’s easy to accumulate negative emotions from the little day-to-day interruptions of peace in our lives. Gratitude and appreciation will help us look at those interruptions as gifts.

Learning to use gratitude and appreciation within a practical ritual is what helped me deal with the many hardships I faced  in life. I was able to snatch the pearl out of each and every incident by ritualizing the feeling state of appreciation.

We must learn to turn feeling appreciative and grateful into a habit. It’s about as healthy as a habit can get.

Have a great weekend!

Staying Optimistic During Tough Times

December 3, 2008

In the last couple weeks I spoke to high school students and business people alike. I am always amazed at how the audience receives the message of hope I deliver in those speeches.

They always ask questions about some of the personal stories I reveal in my book. They find it hard to believe that I was able to hold a level of optimism given some of the trying conditions of my youth (abject poverty, extreme instability…). I always share with those who attend that feeling good and holding a place for hope and optimism is an inside job.

No other person or event should control how they respond on the inside to outside circumstances. No matter how hard life’s punches are, we can decide to remain positive through the pain.

That includes tough economic times, losing a game or any other challenge. Each of us can learn to hold dominion over our internal feeling state. Once we learn how to do that, life becomes much less stressful and much more beautiful.